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  1. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Shane (to himself): This is great. I'm going to get a good grade in friends with benefits, something that is both normal to want and possible to achieve,

    Or:

    When Shane sticks it out at Ilya's house, and the tuna meltdown doesn't happen, he still walks away confused about what Ilya actually WANTS from him. When an opportunity presents itself in the form of Rose Landry and a very thorough PR relationship contract, Shane decides to take advantage of it to show Ilya that he can be a totally chill and normal friend with benefits, and definitely isn't too attached.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,380
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    421
    Kudos:
    4,416
    Bookmarks:
    845
    Hits:
    21,524

    23 May 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    ANANIA: Hi I'm Anania! This is Gaydar, and today we're going to find out if you're gay, straight or a homophobe!

    Or, Hollanov on the Gaydar show with Anania (LOML)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,920
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    182
    Kudos:
    4,084
    Bookmarks:
    596
    Hits:
    16,870

    06 May 2026

  3. Public Bookmark 62

    Tags
    Summary

    Shane kisses him lightly, enticingly, whispering against his lips, “This present is a little different.”
    “Oh?”
    “Mmhm. It comes with the option of whether you want to…” His tongue darts out and strokes along Ilya’s lower lip, “unwrap it or not.”

    or

    Shane Hollander surprises Ilya on their first anniversary with lingerie.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,961
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    16
    Kudos:
    384
    Bookmarks:
    62
    Hits:
    3,365

    04 May 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

    Summary

    paramedics!hollanov verse. (it’s mostly porn)

    Words:
    63,075
    Works:
    3
    Bookmarks:
    1,826

    29 Apr 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    It’s not going viral because Jane’s true identity was exposed—or even because Ilya was blatantly sexting in public. That part’s as expected as Shane doing yoga or any human being on earth breathing.

    No, the texts are going viral because no one can believe how bad this “Jane” is at sexting.

    The women of the world are outraged. The men of the world are baffled. No one can understand why Ilya Rozanov, whose abs have their own fan club, is wasting his time on ‘a piece of cardboard that wished to be turned into a real girl’ (this particular joke has 300k likes and counting).

    Or: After a social media trend mocks Shane's sexting skills, he tries to improve them. It goes about as poorly as you'd expect.

    Now available in Russian

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,196
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    1,599
    Kudos:
    52,802
    Bookmarks:
    10,842
    Hits:
    353,907

    29 Apr 2026

  6. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    The online discourse around Hollanov spans a wide range of people, places, and topics. But there is always one constant.

    #HOLLANOVORCE just will not stop trending.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,047
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    123
    Kudos:
    3,662
    Bookmarks:
    402
    Hits:
    18,465

    27 Apr 2026

  7. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Shane is silent for so long that Rozanov leans, slouching against the doorframe, and raises his eyebrows at him expectantly. “Yes? You are selling bibles?”
    “You fucked my girlfriend.” It tears out of him.
    “Ah,” Rozanov drawls, as if the thought is just now occurring to him, “yes. I did.”

     

    based on a tweet

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    11,710
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    411
    Kudos:
    12,641
    Bookmarks:
    3,281
    Hits:
    152,744

    23 Apr 2026

  8. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Bood
    what have you given her before?

    Ilya
    A fucking, mostly

    Bood
    CHEAP
    CHEAP GIFT GIVER

    Ilya enlists Bood & the Ottawa WAGs to help brainstorm ideas for his first proper Valentine’s Day with ‘Jane’.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    41,287
    Chapters:
    6/6
    Collections:
    2
    Comments:
    2,051
    Kudos:
    24,291
    Bookmarks:
    4,801
    Hits:
    261,643

    19 Apr 2026

  9. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Much of his life is defined by Ilya, his own Gregorian calendar. Before Ilya, Shane spent every heat locked in his apartment, cold-sweating and nauseous and angry. After Ilya, it’s easy. It’s as easy as Ilya’s knot slipping into his cunt, pressing against his walls.

    Shane Hollander: knot-drunk, scent-drunk, and so in love with Ilya.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,144
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    79
    Kudos:
    3,040
    Bookmarks:
    554
    Hits:
    41,683

    04 Apr 2026

  10. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Hallmark makes a movie loosely based on their life.

    Ilya contemplates suing; Shane seems oddly delighted by the whole thing.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,971
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    170
    Kudos:
    4,076
    Bookmarks:
    631
    Hits:
    16,042

    10 Mar 2026

  11. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    “You’ve slept with other couples?” It came out so, so squeaky. Shane immediately cleared his throat.

    “Uh-huh!” Fabian gave him a big smile, which contained just a hint of knowing.

    “H-how was… how was that?” Shane stuttered. Under the table, Ilya squeezed his thigh reassuringly.

    Fabian laughed, a hot little sound low in his throat.
    “Why, are you interested?”

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,796
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    86
    Kudos:
    1,371
    Bookmarks:
    241
    Hits:
    14,134

    02 Mar 2026

  12. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    After inadvertantly bearing witness to a dick pic from "Lily", Hayden goes so hard as an ally that he circles right back around to homophobia.

    Now that Hayden Pike — pure of heart, dumb of ass — has that missing piece, everything makes sense. Of course Shane's cagey about his trans girlfriend. Hayden is so stupid.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,638
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    395
    Kudos:
    2,629
    Bookmarks:
    418
    Hits:
    13,465

    12 Feb 2026

  13. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    This is stupid, he thinks to himself.

    And yet, a few taps later, he’s staring at the search bar, typing three words he never would have expected to Google when he woke up that morning.

    Ilya Rozanov thong.

    or

    Shane buys lingerie and Ilya loses his mind.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    12,641
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    56
    Kudos:
    1,722
    Bookmarks:
    465
    Hits:
    21,343

    29 Jan 2026

  14. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    The Raiders have known for years that Rozanov was seeing a Montreal girl

    They decide to text her

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,665
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    198
    Kudos:
    11,699
    Bookmarks:
    1,090
    Hits:
    68,412

    28 Jan 2026

  15. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    There's a lot of stress in the life of a hockey wife and mom of four.

    She never has to wonder what he's up to in Boston, at least. He's exactly where she wants him to be.

    In bigger, rougher hands.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    981
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    46
    Kudos:
    1,199
    Bookmarks:
    120
    Hits:
    8,277

    25 Jan 2026

  16. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    “It is the worst day of my life,” Ilya declares, throwing himself dramatically onto one of the kitchen stools. “I went to go get lunch at Russian place I like, the one with lamb pelmeni? They had sign on the door. They are closing. Forever.”

    -

    Or: Ilya’s favorite Russian restaurant in Ottawa is going out of business. There is only one thing Shane “Mr. Real Estate” Hollander can do.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,728
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    378
    Kudos:
    14,105
    Bookmarks:
    2,632
    Hits:
    71,658

    25 Jan 2026

  17. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Shane sends him a text that says 'thinking about your cock' with a picture of his rippling abs, and even though Ilya really appreciates the abs, all he can think about is the faint bruise blooming on Shane's ribs, and whether it hurts him very badly, and whether there's anything Ilya could do to make it hurt less, if he were there. He wants to be there, he realizes. He wants to be there for the rest of his life.

    He has to duck out of the team weight room so he can cough up a fistful of petals.

    So.

    -

    Or: Ilya gets Hanahaki disease.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,703
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    281
    Kudos:
    8,514
    Bookmarks:
    1,773
    Hits:
    68,433

    25 Jan 2026

  18. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    “Ilya Rozanov,” Shane repeats slowly, letting himself taste the words. He grins. “Wow. You’re, like, a really good player. How come you’re in Canada for summer camp? Is that weird to ask? Sorry if that’s weird. I just meant-”

    Shane is cut off by a hand on his mouth. He flushes.

    “Too fast,” Ilya says. “My English… not good.”

    “Sorry,” Shane mumbles into Ilya’s hand. Ilya grins and shakes his head, curls dancing, as he pulls his hand away.

    “Is okay. Slow words. Okay?”

    This year marks thirteen year Shane Hollander's third summer at Coach Marakov's elite hockey training camp. In attendance for the first time: Ilya Rozanov, visiting from Russia. Shane isn't the most sociable, and Ilya's English isn't the greatest, yet the unlikely duo soon become the best of friends.

    It's just one summer, but it makes a world of difference.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,769
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    1,044
    Kudos:
    26,990
    Bookmarks:
    6,581
    Hits:
    196,517

    14 Jan 2026

  19. Public Bookmark *

    Words:
    44,727
    Works:
    6
    Bookmarks:
    1,459

    07 Jan 2026

  20. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    “Should call you the Ottawa Puppies,” says the Toronto centre, Svensson. As an insult it makes no sense, so Ilya ignores it, until he continues, “Hear Hollander keeps you on a short leash.”

    Ilya is the captain, so if anything, he should be holding the leash. In English, you can be singular or plural, but he knows what Svensson is trying to say. He is saying Ilya Rozanov, you are Hollander’s bitch.

    “Only sometimes,” Ilya replies, grinning. He wins the face off.

    OR: Ilya trains himself to be a very, very good guard dog for Shane.

    Series
    • Part 1 of Dog
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,424
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    16
    Comments:
    956
    Kudos:
    32,290
    Bookmarks:
    5,898
    Hits:
    271,753

    06 Jan 2026

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